If you will ask your 10 friends, what do they imply by how to be happy, then likely you will get 10 different answers that will be mutually exclusive.
In reality, everyone understands the notion of happiness his or her own way.
Someone believes that the main thing is the material welfare, the other will sacrifice for the sake of his family. Someone for being happy needs to realize himself and someone cannot imagine his life without serving to people. More often you can hear that being happy is to have no problems.
The interesting thing is that everyone is right, as happiness is that individual aspect that to apply yours to someone else will not work.
What do you need for happiness, to be happy?
I have two friends: Nat and Mary. They are both beauties, both of them are from full-fledged families, in general – the average girls with good natural gifts and without some sorts of problems. However, they have quite the contrary attitude to life.
Mary is a furious perfectionist, she is always in motion, she is always looking for flaws in everything. She has already built a great career, and she does not want to stop.
Nat is a less successful person, who adjusted to be happy because of all the events in her life: leaves on trees, trips in public transport (according to her: “it is more convenient to think in it”), original cheap furniture – and accepts misfortune, as signs of fate: “Do not come in! It is dangerous!”
How do you think, who is right?
I think, that the majority will take Mary’s part. Indeed, a purposeful successful girl, not like Nat. And I would say that they are both wrong.
Nat – because she cannot overcome difficulties and ready to be happy with few, and Mary – because she cannot be happy with her success and she barely understands how to be happy. But if you will ask me, who is happier among them, I will definitely tell – Nat! She can really enjoy even the little things, what few pay attention at the wetpainted staircase, playing puppies, fresh bakery, and so on. And truly important events make her delight.
I am often impressed by these qualities of the friend of mine, however, I sometimes angry with her, that she could achieve more if she tried.
8 steps how to reach success
What prevents from being happy?
As it is seen on the example of my friends, happiness is not always the synonym of a successful career, material security, and other benefits. Sometimes to be happy our own character traits, complexes, and prejudice. Let’s try to figure out which ones exactly.
The above-mentioned perfectionism.
Of course, it is necessary to treat yourself self-critically, true that every work needs to be done impeccably, of course, it is necessary to set a high bar to become successful, but do not turn it into a mania. Before achieving the next pick it is necessary to take a 5-minute break and enjoy the work that you have done, to praise yourself, to reward with an expensive purchase or go on a vacation to the country you’ve always dreamed about. Do not stop on the achieved, however, do not rush at a breakneck pace without having the feeling of joy from life.
Even if you are really offended: by colleagues, your beloved one, friends, and you angry with them quite justified, do not keep this feeling. Release it, forget it, and you will immediately feel happier.
The thing is not about the fear of darkness or monsters. I am about people, who are often very anxious. One of my colleagues is anxious at any occasion: is the article well-written, is the faucet at home not broken, is the pie well-baked, will she gain weight in a year, and so on. Even at the happiest moments, her face is slightly frightened. Well, such a person will never know how to be happy.
Those, who live in the world of dreams, will never be able to be happy in reality. They are so concentrated on their fantasies, which are often far from reality, that they do not see happy moments around. They wait for a prince but do not notice caring cute guy near them, dreaming about fame or engrossing job (spy, diplomat, supermodel), ignoring their everyday duties.
What is happiness: thinking out loud
Envy, love of gossip, hatred, cruelty – are in general, qualities inherent in bad people. Anger generally destroys and does not give the opportunity to enjoy the life. If you feel happy, only having made a bad thing to another person, I’m truly sorry for you, honestly!
I want to be happy!
It is this very arrangement will help you to experience positive emotions daily. The prescription medication with the name on “how to be happy” consists of only two components:
- Want it.
- Become it.
This is in fact, not that hard if you will learn to accept with dignity all the faith’s blows, not to stop on the achieved results, to be sincerely happy with not only your successes but your surroundings’ ones. It is necessary for you to understand that only in fairy-tales life consists of exclusively happy moments, the reality, instead, is much more severe. The main thing is not to focus on your misfortunes!
Believe me, we face these testing not just for some reason, but for the purpose of we to learn lessons from them. If you think, that the black bond in your life has been for too long, then, look for the bright moments, even if they are quite insignificant.
Sooner or later you will adjust to being happy every day…
However, sometimes our small pleasures, like aubergine salad help us to be happier in a certain period of life.